Gray Matter

This is a big week for our basketball team. We lost a heart breaker last week to end the regular season. We are going into playoffs this week. We didn't get the seed that we were hoping for, but we did get a fun road to the championship. We are going to end up playing a team that didn't want to play us earlier in the year. We called to put them on our schedule, and their coach said that we weren't an "exciting enough team to play against." Can anyone say Karma. Now I don't really believe in that stuff, but I think it is really ironic that we are going to end up playing a team that didn't want to play us. I love that. And I pray that we just stick it to them.

So it is going to be a big week. Winding down the season and getting to the real exciting stuff. Just had a week off of school which was very relaxing and needed. Spent some quality time on the golf course and got to hang out with Heather. Heather went up to Redding to visit our nephew who is SUPER cute, leaving me here to fend for myself this weekend.

So this weekend I spent a lot of time by myself. Got to think a lot about nothing, and about everything. I don't really know why, but I got to thinking about a lot of big things. Choices, decisions, just life in general. And of course Will. I still miss him. A lot actually. I still miss him. I still stand outside my classroom between periods and expect to see him walking by and saying hi. I keep waiting for him to come into my room in the middle of class and totally disrupt everything in the most awesome way possible. I keep waiting to hear him laugh. I keep waiting to see him walk around the corner, and see that SMILE on his face. I still miss you WILL. I still miss you a lot. And I still don't get it. I am still looking for answers.

You grow up wondering what you are going to spend the rest of your life doing. When you are little, you tell yourself that you are going to be a doctor, or fireman, or athlete. And then you get a little older, and you tell yourself you are going to be an attorney or engineer. And then it comes time to actually figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life. And you make this big decision without even really knowing what your life would look like if you went down that road. So you take this big leap and hope that you like what you do. And it is okay if you don't like your path. You can always change. But it is this huge decision, I mean, it is what you are going to work towards the rest of your life. YIKES!!!!!

So I went into teaching, wondering if I would even like it. All the planning, dealing with kids, dealing with parents. AND I LOVE IT! I am in my classroom right now. It is during one of my prep periods that I don't have class. 5 of my students have ditched out on class to come stop by my class. (For the record I have told them all to go back to class.) I love my job. I guess I just get high school students. To me, they are awesome. A little misguided and stupid, but a ton of fun. And I love teaching math. I like getting kids that HATE math, to at least be okay with it at the least. And get some kids to LOVE math. It is a ton of fun. I LOVE MY JOB. And I am very blessed to love my job. And very blessed to have one.